Author Archives: Ed Pluchar

Love Letter to a Skeptic

Love Letter to a Skeptic

You know who you are.  Just be yourself now, be comfortable.  I only want to talk to you.

Forgive me, I don’t often make gestures like this.  My love letters have been narrowly circulated.  Still, I am compelled, and it is by love.

Our relationship to God points to an immense asymmetry; as though that were not obvious.  But it is not always so obvious, and so we have the idea that attempts to define God are restricted to analogy; attempts to understand God are folly; we try to pull God down and fit him into our minds, when we ought to lift our minds and fit them within the reality of God.

There is another asymmetry worth mentioning:  Between you, dear skeptic, and atheism.  That is, you cannot fit into atheism.  It is smaller than you, too small for you.  You are a human being – atheism fits you like the wings of a butterfly.  It appears as liberty, but it is only over-indulgance.  It appears as freedom, but it is only a free fall.

No – real liberty, real freedom, have a referent.  They must refer to something, or else they mean nothing.

And atheism, being nothing at all, does not properly fit into you, either.  It is like an empty stomach, a hole in the heart.  It doesn’t fit into anything – it only leaves a gnawing ache.  It is a sign of something missing.

What of love, then?

You are more than a void, you are more than a pre-determined and meaningless accident.  These are the unicorns, these fabricated entities – nothing like them exists.  There is no meaningless accident.  (Cynic, hold back your protest).

No – when you love, you rise above any conceivable reality composed only of matter.  Quantum vacuums cannot love; a supernova cannot love; a flower cannot love; though we may be tempted to believe so because of their beauty.

Now, naturally, naturalism might come roaring in.  Perhaps love will one day be reduced to an algorithm.  Maybe two, since it has a peculiar out-going and in-flowing quality about it, requiring two sequences of operation.  Maybe it will be explained by the likes of evolutionary psychologists, whose playful efforts have made for interesting bathroom reading, but could not be relied upon by a policeman or a poet.

Just for a moment, be still.  Hear the feeble voice of someone trying to love you.  Hear, not the tune, but the soul of every love song.  Pull together the discordant thoughts; yes, seek the pattern.  If atheism is true – whence comes the pattern?  From nothing?

What faith!

But there is nothing in that faith except impossible things.  There is no love – not love which is also the heartbeat of creation, which is also color against the gray of suffering and dull reliance on only those things immediately in front of us.  Those things even more transient than our short lives, those things you burden with the weight of all possible meaning.

Love is electricity, love is the Big Bang.  Love is money in your pocket, when you come to realize someone else put it there.

Love is a steady but not static Universe, with laws that are firm, with hidden patterns and minds prepared to discern those patterns.

Love is childbirth, a warm hug in a cold world, the steady tick of a clock which reminds you, all suffering will pass.

Love is the second cheek, patient forbearance, the extra mile, the happy martyr.  These things do not matter in an atheistic Universe, no more than a stiff neck; with God, they are tokens of eternity.

Transcendence, then?  Dear skeptic, have you sought transcendence by denying God, as though you could get over, through, under, or around Him?  As though, with the Author out of the way, you could tell the story your own way?

Put aside childish things.  Bring your fingers to the ground – you did not make the least grain of sand, not even the dirt that crunches beneath your feet.  Breathe in the air – that was not of your making, neither the oxygen nor the lungs.  Give a shout – not a thing will move or even hear you, unless the Author permits it to be so.

No – what is better than atheism (which only declares the absence of a promise, and boasts the absence of meaning)?  Anything, of course – but the Truth, above all.

You could not write the whole story – but you are like the Author, and so you have stories to tell.  You could not create out of nothing – but you are like the Designer, and so you can invent.  You could not produce even the dazzling elegance of a cell, certainly not from as-yet unknown particles obeying as-yet unknown laws – but you are a child of God, and you can have children of your own.

If you will take just one step down, dear skeptic, off of that piddling, petty pedestal you’ve made, you might have a ladder, with angels ascending and descending from Heaven.  If you will not shirk the weight of faith, you might bear the weight of your full dignity, take up a throne of glory.

You have no reason, I know, to change your mind.  Love seldom converts a cynic.

But still it moves.





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Litany of Humility

Litany of Humility


Maybe you’ve seen this.  Every once in a while I come across something which is, in an accurate way, devastating to my ego.  More on the ego another time…

I’m tempted to say that most people should experience a similar response, though that’s probably an egotistical thing to say.  Therefore, I will say that every line advances the line before it, the total effect I might liken to an imagined world where I own a profitable casino.  One day the casino is struck by lightning, and the fire steadily grabs hold of the entire building and burns it down.  The conclusion of the prayer is like staring at the smoldering ruins, and all that mix of emotions before such (perhaps holy) devastation. The prayer can be found at http://www.ewtn.com/Devotionals/prayers/humility.htm, among other sites.

O Jesus! meek and humble of heart, Hear me.

From  the desire of being esteemed,


Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being loved…

From the desire of being extolled …

From the desire of being honored …

From the desire of being praised …

From the desire of being preferred to others…

From the desire of being consulted …

From the desire of being approved …

From the fear of being humiliated …

From  the fear of being despised…

From the fear of suffering rebukes …

From the fear of being calumniated …

From the fear of being forgotten …

From the fear of being ridiculed …

From the fear of being wronged …

From the fear of being suspected …

That others may be loved more than I,

Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

  That others may be esteemed more than I …

That, in the opinion of the world,

others may increase and I may decrease …

That others may be chosen and I set aside …

That others may be praised and I unnoticed …

That others may be preferred to me in everything…

That others may become holier than I,
provided that I may become as holy as I should…







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Lifeline to the Faithful

Lifeline to the Faithful


The faith is a demanding thing, and the way may well be impossible.

You are a creature, in the flesh, and subject to the stresses and demands of physical survival.  You can no more extract yourself from the natural world than you can leap off the Earth and land on the Moon.

We will ever be at odds with the world, and if we are not, that shall be a warning to us.  As it is, the more one is faithful, the more he will be hated.

The darkness is always closing in.

 

The world then, with its powerful and mighty, its famed and fortunate, has an appeal the faithful can never capture.  There is enmity and it cannot be bridged.  The advantage, so long as we are in the world, belongs to the worldly.

So you may find yourself beaten down.  In a world upside-down – as it will ever be – your virtue is a drag on your success, your kindness is weakness, your modesty is a limit beyond which your competitors race to defeat you.

You may come to think that, despite the echoes of your dreams, dreams from a far-off place, you are destined to a middling life.  Gray and sluggish, commoditized, leaving no impression by which you will ever be remembered.

But you’ve got it all wrong;  You have swallowed the lie.

 

I am your brother, listen to me:  You have closed yourself off from God.

God – does not – permit mediocrity.  He will spit you out, and perhaps He has.

 

Here is how you will find the moment of expectoration:  When did you last avoid a good action because of fear?   It is that simple – in your family, in your business, in your spiritual life, when you have found something good to be too much, or too dreadful, you assumed the temperature of the room.  You were no longer pleasing to the taste, giving satisfaction to the thirst.

 

The lie is that, as a child of God, you are bound to defeat.  No need to begin fighting, it will all end in flames and ashes.

The enemy is no fool.  He knows that if he can demoralize you before you’ve begun to fight back, he’s already won.

The game is rigged against you, he says.  He holds all the cards.  Go ahead, make a run at it – see how easily you are slapped down?  And what are you resisting sin for, after all?  If it is all for God and the ultimate victory, why does God not win right now?  Why does He make it all but impossible for you to succeed?

 

Now, do you see how you have been poisoned and duped?  Do you see how the world has trampled upon your God-given dignity, and has stifled the mighty works God meant to work through you?  It is time to go in, whips in hand, and throw the tables over.

The truth is, you have not trusted God enough.  You have accepted, from fear or disappointment, that He will not come through for you.

Perhaps you are inadequate (you are).  Perhaps you are imperfect (doubtless).  Yes, you have failed, and you have shamed yourself, and you have given every earthly reason to any worldly power that you are not up to the task.

Do you see the lie?  You will see it when you hear the truth:  You do not answer to a worldly power.  You answer to the Almighty.

Therefore!  It does not matter if you have failed by worldly measures, over and over again.  It does not matter if you have showed yourself inadequate for the task, lacking in perseverance, intelligence, skill.

Fool!  IT. IS. NOT. ABOUT. YOU.

Do you wonder why Adam and Eve ate of the apple?  First, clean your lips of that bitter sweetness… you have sunk your teeth into the lie and devoured it whole.

 

Let’s put it starkly, written in a flame against the blackness of night:  The Devil has isolated you from God, and proceeded to devour you.  This is why you are demoralized, beaten down, perpetually inadequate, in motion and going nowhere.

The Devil is virtually a god and has convinced you that you must face him under your own power.  Every failure, every weak moment, every grasp at evil is one more victory for him, and one more defeat for you.  And you have no hope of overcoming him…

 

…alone.

But of course he has lied to you.  He rigged the game, he set you up for destruction.  Now, you know better.

You, as always, must call on the Almighty.  You must call on Him with all of the desperation of a drowning man, because truly you cannot defeat the waves.  You must call on him as though the enemy came fully armed, has you surrounded, and is counting down to your annihilation.  Because you cannot defeat death.

 

But He can.

And there it is, my brother, my sister.  Look to Him, always.  Pray to Him, at every moment, for every good thing – especially in your need.

Then, simply hold on.  Work and strive and fight with everything you have, reinforced by the power of God.  One day you will barely be able to stand, and the next you will be lifting mountains.  First, you will strain to walk, then you will race with all speed to the ends of the earth.

Many will doubt, and then you will succeed beyond all of their expectations.

Many will forecast doom, and you will deliver victory.


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Infant Invader

Infant Invader


In our time, Christmas is a lovely thing.  It is universally observed as a time for giving, family, good works.  Only a little more narrowly, it is the great holy day, brought out as something better than any heirloom or treasure, recognized as the arrival of a singular hero, God Himself.

The comfort of family and traditions veils the shock.  Consider the infant!

A baby in the room will elicit warm smiles, soft coos, sure hands to cradle her.  The infant receives and cannot offer, cries but cannot articulate, trusts but cannot protect herself from harm.

At Christmas, we are not often reminded that the world is still enemy territory.  Christmas is the time when it feels as though the world could be otherwise – perhaps there could be peace on Earth.

But that is not the pretense for the Incarnation.  The pretense is that the world is fallen, is in need of redemption.  The pretense, as Christ later says, is that men are wicked, this generation is faithless.  They cannot grapple with the mess they’re in.  It will destroy them.

Now, if you had all power and determined to fight and win this conflict, would you begin by emptying yourself of all that power and appearing as an infant behind enemy lines?  This is the paradox that would destroy all reality:  That God made Himself utterly vulnerable to death.

That baby in the manger is everything.  And he has nothing, can say nothing, can protect nothing.

Why?

 

We with finite powers may begin to answer this:  If we had all power, we might storm the earth, take the holy innocents trapped behind enemy lines, and speed them to Paradise.  And then, if we had the stomach for it – and we would, being holy – we would destroy whatever remained in water and fire, and begin again.

But who, exactly, would you have rescued?

All are under the grip of sin.  None are innocent.  You would return to Heaven empty-handed, and turn around and destroy all those you meant to save.

 

Do you see the predicament?  We are willing captives.  We choose this every time we sin.  Meanwhile, God loves us and wishes to redeem us to unimaginable glory.

If He comes in force, we are likely as not to resist!  Our guards go up, and all of the things we value more than we should, all of the priorities we have placed above Him – these things we cling to in defiance of Him.

Not you?  Do it now, then.  Go where He has been calling you.  Give up the sins, give up even the good things which nevertheless stand in your way.  Leave all things behind – do not look back – and follow Him.

 

See it now?  You are the enemy’s territory.  Your heart is behind enemy lines.  God cannot rescue you by destroying you.

Make no mistake.  There is evil, and it must ultimately be destroyed.  Violently, with a permanence so profound you will not remember it existed.

Yet you are redeemable, and one of the ways you can observe this is by your response to an infant.  Do you offer a smile?  Does your hope awaken?  Would you protect the baby from harm?

It was a master stroke, wasn’t it?  God almighty, appearing as an infant invader?

He had to come claim your heart, first.  Only then could He lead you out.


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Hobby Lobby and Secularism

Hobby Lobby and Secularism


The controversy over the Supreme Court decision on Burwell v. Hobby Lobby has been…well, hysterical, when you think about it. There are, for instance, otherwise intelligent people shuddering for the United States. It is unbecoming for a scientist to be reading tea leaves – principally because they aren’t any good at it – since it causes them to declare that a “theocracy” is afoot.

Of course the word “theocracy” only enters the conversation because it’s scary, like communism, and not because anything like a theocracy is imminently threatening.

Rather than dig into the case as one more bloviating layperson, I’d like to comment on an issue which plays into the discussion, which has plenty of application over and above SCOTUS.

Namely, there is a peculiar fear of religion, and a distinction of religion from…well, I guess the “normal” or “ordinary” way of looking at things. There is also the widespread illusion that science and religion are so different from each other that they are actually opposed.

Here I would like to introduce the notion of worldview. This is simply the way a person believes the world to be.

Is the world knowable, or not?  If so, how can we know it, and what can we know about it? Is there a God, or not? Am I the only one who exists, or do all these other people exist in the same way that I do?

If these questions sound philosophical, that’s because they are. One’s worldview might also be likened to one’s personal philosophy. What do you perceive to be the purpose of life, if anything? What is all of this for? What duties and obligations do you have, if any?

How one answers questions like these, then, determines (or is indicative of) his worldview.

It should be obvious, I think, that while there may be trends in the way people answer these questions (the ancient Chinese might answer differently than the medieval Muslims, who again answer differently than modern Latin Americans), there is not necessarily any neat, “standard” response.

In other words, there is not a neat, “normal” response from which we could say that religion departs. If anything, religion would have to be part of that normal response, given its ubiquity across space and time.

Now, let us usher in an interesting idea: Secularism. This, of course, is a lack of commitment to any particular religion, and a positive commitment toward the common understanding of the common good. This is such an alluring idea, in fact, that it is taken to be the “standard” worldview, from which other worldviews (especially religious worldviews) depart.

I would then argue: Secularism is not meant to be a worldview. It is meant to be a mutual agreement not to impose any particular worldview. In the same way, a recipe is not an ingredient – it is a description of the way the ingredients are meant to come together.

The fascinating thing – to this bloviator, anyway – is that in its refusal to impose a particular religious worldview, secularism has thus seemed very attractive to those who reject all religious worldviews – I mean, atheists.

In fact, many atheists have often been only too happy to wear the mantle of secularism, and many Christians have been too dense to understand the distinction: Atheism is a worldview, but secularism is not. (I do think, lest I hang too many of my brethren in Christ, that plenty of atheists are so fanatical as to miss the distinction, too).

The truth is, both Christians and atheists (and Muslims, and Hindus, and…) should be happy to wear the mantle of secularism – unless they have a better strategy for governing in a pluralistic society.

Or, I suppose, unless they intend to install a theocracy.

Now, critical to secularism, it seems to me, is the free exercise of religion; but let’s amend it, and call it the free exercise of worldview.* We should not leave the atheists out, after all, or they might claim the whole damned system for themselves and install an anti-theist-ocracy. (Don’t laugh…it’s been done).

Let’s ask the question: Is it right to impose on an employer (or anyone), and require her to provide for a product or treatment to which she is morally opposed?

Is it really in line with the idea of secularism that we should require people to act in opposition to their worldviews, so that other people will receive what is considered “good” within their worldview?

Forget for a moment that this was an issue raised mainly by Christians. Think of yourself, and your sincerely held worldview. Think of one particular action which you find morally offensive.

The argument is, can a society really be justified in forcing you to commit (or be complicit in) that action, no matter how “good” other members of that society perceive it to be?

Don’t be hasty. Don’t assume you’re cool with whatever. That is not the meaning of secularism.

The meaning of secularism is to provide a real opportunity for people of multi-various worldviews to live authentically within their own worldviews, while living in common with each other.

Government impositions on sincerely held beliefs are a sin in secularism. They cripple secularism.

And they necessarily favor one worldview over others.

 

*Whether this bears the spirit of the Framers is a fair and interesting question, but I aim to talk about secularism principally as a concept, and not within any particular historical context.


Comments

  1. This post, as all others that you have written, is a thought provoking piece, willing to challenge the reader, and move outside of the trope talking points of a subject. However, I feel you are too ready to take the side of Hobby Lobby because they state this entire issue was based on religious freedom. A corporation is not capable of religious beliefs. If corporations truly based business decisions on religious practices there would be very few businesses because a great many would be unable to survive because the very nature of business, especially a successful one, goes against the basic principles of Christianity. Had this been an Catholic Diocese or a Baptist College or an Islamic School that was claiming religious conflict with a law it maybe reasonable to grant religious exceptions but a multimillion dollar privately owned business should not be given the same consideration.


    1. Hey Frank,

      Believe it or not, this is the first I’ve been able to come back to this post with any time to talk about it. There seems to be few good threads going on my wall, but even that I’ve not been able to keep up with. More’s the pity.

      It may be easier here, since it’s just you and me for the moment, and I think we’ll probably hit on many of the points raised over there.

      First, let me say that I’ve always appreciated your feedback, and I actually thought of you after this post went live. Figured it might be the first time we take opposing views. I’m glad you recognize my desire to get away from the talking points and the talking past.

      Let me offer this: There is a sense in which I would be inclined to agree with you. In fact, I think your argument is particularly strong for publicly traded companies, or otherwise companies which are not “closely held”. I don’t say that I agree completely, but I think that’s where the strength of your argument lies.

      Just for a moment, though, given the view of secularism I described, I’d like to walk through the following scenario.

      Say I want to start a business. (In fact, I do). Say I want to build furniture for special needs kids (I’ve given this serious thought).

      Now, for the sake of our illustration, say I own and operate the business until I die. And though it starts modestly, it becomes a multimillion dollar business – all the while, I’m still the sole owner.

      Once it becomes feasible, I begin to offer health insurance, because I think it’s a good thing to do. It also remains something of a competitive advantage (which is why employer-based health coverage began: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Health_insurance_in_the_United_States).

      The decision to offer the coverage, of course, was mine. It wasn’t the decision of some conceptual entity – I was the actor. I was the cause of that effect. If I had decided otherwise, that’s what would happen.

      Here is the crux – given that I own the business, and that I am the primary actor behind all decisions for that company – under what circumstances should I be forced to act contrary to my conscience, if any?

      If, like Mr. Lyons, you want to say that I should be so forced if Federal law requires it (ignoring the many weaknesses of that idea), is there any boundary at all placed on Federal law? If so, where, and why there?

      True, my business is not explicitly a religious business. At what point in the process of starting, building, and running my business – leading, hypothetically, to great success – do I give up my right to act according to my conscience? Is it after I make the first million?

      Furthermore, I sympathize with your notion that

      “If corporations truly based business decisions on religious practices there would be very few businesses because a great many would be unable to survive because the very nature of business, especially a successful one, goes against the basic principles of Christianity.”

      However, I would disagree that it’s absolutely true. Anyway, the nature of business is something of a non sequitor: Whatever anyone thinks about the possibility of a successful Christian business, the point here is a matter of conscience (anyone’s conscience).

      My questions, Frank, are meant to be challenging, but not conversation killers. If you have answers, I am genuinely interested to know. I have simply been dissatisfied with the talking point tropes, as you put it, and want to dig up some of those basic principles which have taken on baggage (or eroded) over time.

      Ed

      PS – I tried to do an HTML tag on the quote I cited. Not sure if it’s going to work – apologies for any confusion.


  2. I really appreciate your definition of secularism. Very different than how I usually see it defined.


    1. Hey Jennifer – thanks for visiting!

      Yes, the understanding of secularism has been subverted, I think, and so I tried a little subversion to get it back.


Granite and God

Granite and God


If you’re not already a fan of www.houzz.com, I highly recommend it.  The pictures are often gorgeous, and the things people do with architecture and decor really are amazing.  (It can sometimes be approached as a challenge by the DIY types).

Well, Houzz led me to this site by way of an article on kitchen upgrades, and so I took in what information could find.  I’m not keen on granite, so the idea that its favor is fading intrigues me.  (Nanotech countertops?!  The future is now).

And good heavens, don’t forget the comments.  A debate broke out over the existence of God!

Granted:  It takes a little over 30 comments to get to God, and up until then, the comments were largely relevant to the article.  I was enjoying the back and forth, as I know nothing about geology.  There are even some fun electron jokes thrown in for good measure.

Now, it would seem “Faith Priest” said something worthy of being censored; though the content is lost, we get an idea from “guru dogg” that it was incendiary, possibly explosive.

“When you see a warhead missile detonating above your city, how will your state of mind react to the state of burning flesh? When your eyes melt in your sockets, how loud will you call out to God?”

Huh?  I, for one, really want to know what Faith Priest said.  No matter, there’s still some fine material ahead.  “Bubbawubba Gump” says,

Holy bat sh*t crazy, Batman! @guru, you have spent way too much time in a dark room dreaming of what god will do to everyone and you should see a psychiatrist. If the bombs drop they will definitely be sent by some psycho who believes God wants him to destroy the world, not by someone who doesn’t believe in an afterlife.”

So, Gump starts off in the land of humor and proportional response, then takes a sharp turn toward Dawkinsville, where any instance of evil is “definitely” the the fault of religion.  Because only religious people perpetrate evil.

“Geri” tries to bring the conversation to the abstract:

Without God, I am the sole authority and measure of my own good. There is no objective measure of good unless it is in comparison it to the infinite goodness, God Himself.”

Geri is actually getting ahead of me in the series on objective morality, but you can guess I agree with his/her point.  Not that the combox following an article on countertop surfaces is the best place to plant one’s flag.

Not one to let a reasonable point be made, “jfahle3” retorts:

“See, caveperson, I don’t believe in an invisible sky giant. Fortunately for you, I don’t need an invisible sky giant to tell me not to steal from you, I just know it’s not right to steal from you.”

Let’s see – presuming superiority by name-calling, grossly misrepresenting what is meant by God, and failing to comprehend the point he/she is criticizing.  Here is the New Atheist trifecta!*

Something is missing, though.  “SwoodTN” goes for the knock-out with a left hook nobody saw coming…

Interesting article about granite. You know what is really interesting about granite? It can be found on every continent on earth and has the distinction of being carbon dated as earth’s oldest rock. Scientists say it formed over millions of years as the earth’s surface cooled. But if you look at granite under a spectron microscope, you will see radio halos trapped inside.”

Unless you’ve read Internet comboxes before, then you totally saw it coming.  Here is the “But how do you explain this?” angle, which takes a narrow set of facts and interprets them in an apparently straightforward way, with the conclusion that God did it.  Frankly, the jargon is beyond me, but the rhetoric is par for the course.

“Prism” replies with the obligatory, jargon-for-jargon rebuttal:

“(2) Granites that have been appropriately age-dated (using K-Ar, U-Pb, Rb-Sr isotope dating, e.g.) range from billions to less than a million years old. Felsic magma may be cooling deep in the earth (forming new granite) even as we speak (basic earth processes continue to operate as always), but younger intrusive rocks are not yet exposed at the surface for study.
And (3) re: radio halos in granite – not even close to true. See http://paleo.cc/ce/halos.htm”

When you’re numbering your points 40 comments deep in an article about kitchen upgrades, you might be wasting your time.  It might be easier to say, “That’s interesting,” and point out that a mysterious occurrence in geology – if it is actually mysterious – does not tell us much about the existence of God, the ground of all reality.

Only two more, because they are more down to earth (or, up to the surface?).  “Stevo” says:

So called scientific TRUTHS are only theories that are constantly amended as more facts are discovered. Christianity is belief in proven facts about Jesus that only requires faith.”

I think I get what Stevo is saying, but his intellectual opponents on dishwashers.reviewed.com are not even going to try.  Remember, Christian brothers and sisters – when in doubt, be modest in your claims.  If you have no doubt, be even more modest.

We finish with “PlacidAir,” who replies,

There are no “proven facts” about Jesus — that’s why it’s called ‘faith’.

I strain myself here to understand what PlacidAir is saying, though as a disposition, I do endorse modesty (see above).  Is PlacidAir saying that we have not proven that Jesus existed, for instance?  The simple existence of Jesus of Nazareth is as close to certain as it can be – doubting it gets you the label of “Myther,” which is about the same level as the “FlatEarther“.

There probably is some grand take-away here, but I’ve relayed this combox debate simply because I found it amusing.  I hope it lightens your day.

 

*As always, the New Atheist is to be contrasted with the serious, non-militant atheist.  They may be distinguished by the following measure:  The latter can be reasoned with.


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Fire-Breathing Catholics

Fire-Breathing Catholics

“If they should come for the innocent without stepping over your body, then cursed be your religion and your life!”  – Dorothy Day

Yes, how is that for a litmus test?  I can’t read or even think of this line without shivering.  I think I would have the same reaction if I had ever had the opportunity to meet Dorothy Day.

This may or may not become a series, but I’m confident there is enough material.






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Fire-breathing Catholics – St. Henry Morse

Fire-breathing Catholics – St. Henry Morse

About to be martyred:

“Come, my sweetest Jesus, that I may now be inseparably united to thee in time and eternity:  welcome ropes, hurdles, gibbets, knives and butchery, welcome for the love of Jesus, my saviour.”

St. Morse’s story is almost absurd in its repetition.  Well, that’s one Jesuit who made the list…

Thanks to Quotable Saints, compiled by Ronda De Sola Chervin.






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Fatherhood

Fatherhood


Without wanting to get anyone’s hands too dirty, I think it can be said without controversy that fathers suffer a bruised reputation these days.  I will give you evidence – my favorite coffee shop, Caribou Coffee, has offered “BOGO” drinks on Mother’s Day, but had to be petitioned to offer them again (the following year) on Father’s Day.  BOGO, of course, stands for “buy one, get one (free)”.

I mostly wanted free coffee, and would readily admit that mothers deserve the honor before fathers do.  I think it’s proper that Mother’s Day should arrive first each year.

A funny thing happens to fathers who venture out with their children and without their mother.  After a stranger, approaching in admiration, comments to me, “You’ve really got your hands full!” – four kids and their Papa, walking around the farmers market in good order and with pleasant dispositions – the next thing she/he says is, “You’re done now, right?”

If you are not the parent of multiple children, the intimation may not be obvious.  What the stranger means is, you’re done having children, since four is plenty, right?

I think I’m quite within my rational rights to be upset about such a comment, but of course I’m not.  After all, though I enjoy talking with most people, I also realize it does not take long to get to the first of their many active hypocrisies.  Many of these people, after all, are older, and many of those come from families larger than 6.

And why be upset?  Though they may not imagine it as such, I am blessed four times over.  More than that, truth be told.

Just think of it – four people, under my care and deeply woven into my life.  And the metaphor goes on – it’s actually a seamless experience, for me.  I don’t compartmentalize my fatherhood, any more than I do my manhood.  Rather, I am a father, at every hour of the day, no matter what I am doing.  At any moment, I may be compelled by duty (and love) to wipe a nose, discipline against a bad behavior, teach a bit of logic or knowledge, wipe a butt, carry a little person bodily for her/his comfort, evoke a laugh or enjoy one, tell a story, sing a song, change a diaper (a lot of wiping going on), research information and gifts, consider opportunities, affirm my love, tickle a little person to tears…

And it’s more than that, it really is.

(In a bit of serendipity, I was just told by an old-ish friend that I remind her of Atticus, played by Gregory Peck.  She flattered me enough to think that I might look like he did in To Kill a Mockingbird in 15 years or so, and said that as she came to know me, she thought I’d also be an Atticus type of father.  She didn’t know this, but I consider Atticus one of my role models as a father, and regularly consider what he’d do in a given situation.  I have also joked that my children could call me “Papa” or “Atticus.”)

Perhaps I am only aloof, but I consider myself unbruised by the contemporary opinion of fatherhood.  I am bruised by other things, but not by things so mistaken.  What the contemporary person opines does not even scratch the surface, not even as an insult (as so much mockery does scratch and claw at our sincere beliefs); I am blessed too deeply for that.

You could not sling any taunt which would make me regret being a father.  There is nothing that you could add to me, except virtue, which would enrich me further.

I get to watch people grow from practical invisibility to (God willing) adulthood.  I get to hear some of their first heartbeats.

Moreover, I am privileged with a key role, like a lung the child breathes from, which is both a pressing of my essential qualities (like oil from olives) and an extraordinary opportunity to become better than I was, by leaps and bounds.

And what privilege, what blessing is greatest of all?  No – what terror, what insurmountable difficulty is greater?

By the simple fact that I am “father,” all that I am and all that I do is bound up inextricably in my children’s experience of God, the Father.  I am the lens, the set of constraints, the point of reference – at least for now, but perhaps for life – which shapes their expectations for God.  I pray He will supervene and do greater things than I can do (as He has for me, despite giving me a tremendous father).

And what a thing, I think, that I can nevertheless look to my father and reflect on his depth of character and selflessness, and see in them a pattern from God.  If the least thing can be said of me in this way, I will be happy.

 







One thought on “Fatherhood

  1. Eddie,

    Happy Father’s Day! I am so moved by your reflection on being a father. I want to have Uncle Joe read it too. He is not on facebook, but I call him over to the screen from time to time to show him a picture, etc. He enjoys it. I know he will be especially touched by your reflection.

    Know that Uncle Joe and I have a very special place in our hearts for you, Marcy and your beautiful family. We do understand when other people casually ask if you are “done yet”. I especially remember walking through Jewel with my cart overflowing, a little one in the cart, two toddling behind and me very pregnant, being asked by someone if I know how “that” happens? I was deeply hurt as it was so rude and it went right to my core. I graciously ignored the sarcastic/joking and mentioned how blessed I felt to have children. Being a mother, is one of the greatest gifts God has ever bestowed on me. To be a witness to their lives and be able to love and be loved all the while seeing God’s unique gifts in each one of them….I am plastered to the wall with awe and thankfulness by His graces!!!!

    Yes, you are a wonderful father! Yes, you have an awesome role model in your Dad and both of you reflect God’s goodness and unconditional love. Fatherhood and motherhood are truly the hardest vocations in the world and the best vocations in the world. A child needs both! Praying that you and Marcy take good care of eachother as you parent those beautiful children through life. God is with you!

    Love you & prayers,

    Aunt Kerry


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